Elissa’s Story

“I don’t know anyone that has cracked addiction on their own, but I know loads of people that do it together.”   

Elissa once spent her wedding night in Cyprus, secretly losing all the money she and her wife had been gifted on their special day due to a gambling addiction.  

On what was meant to be the happiest day of a newlywed’s life, she chose to spend it alone in secrecy within the hotel lobby, attached to her mobile phone, engaging in online casino games.  

She had been spending wedding money gifted to the couple to fund her addiction.  

Elissa’s first experience of gambling came at the age of 9, when she would visit local pubs with her family and would make use of a fruit machine. 

That interest would progressively spiral as she went through her life and she developed an interest in online casino games.  

 A former plasterer by trade, Elissa would work day-to-day in her home of Rochdale to help fund her gambling, so she could spend her evenings wagering her daily earnings online. 

“Most days, I would skip my basic needs like lunch, I was constantly thinking about getting home to gamble online. I got sacked by several jobs because I would take cash-in-hand for jobs and would use the money for my addiction” she said.

At the height of her addiction, she was losing £40,000 a year, taking out payday loans, and hiding her secret from loved ones. 

Everything changed when she hit her “rock bottom”, when her ex-partner had asked about the wedding money gifted by their family and friends. 

As the truth came out, she lost everything: her marriage, her home, her stepchildren, her job, and her dignity.  

“I came to Adferiad because my gambling addiction became too much, and I ended up losing everything.

“It cost me everything; my marriage, my step-kids, my home, and job.

“My wife had absolutely no idea what had been going on, she said I had basically lived a double life.”

Facing uncertainty after her truth was revealed, a member of Elissa’s family pointed her in the direction of an Adferiad pathway to combat addictions and improve mental health. 

  After an assessment, she was referred to Adferiad’s Parkland Place rehabilitation unit in North Wales. 

  “It was the best feeling I’d had in a long, long time — getting the dates to go into treatment and knowing I was finally getting help”, she said. 

Here, Elissa learned more about the science related to addiction and was empowered to improve her self-worth through the vital work of counselling and education. 

  However, recovery is rarely a straight line, and after leaving support, Elissa relapsed – turning to alcohol and prescription drugs, once again finding herself in crisis.  

  Recognising she needed more help, Elissa sought guidance from Parkland Place, where she was also directed to North Wales Recovery Communities, a recovery support group that networked individuals from similar experiences.  

“I found out a lot about myself. I don’t hate everyone – I just hated myself. People lift you up from similar experiences.”

Today, Elissa has transformed her story, taking her lived experience to support others within Adferiad. 

Living in Rhyl, Denbigshire, she has given her guidance and experience to support residents of Parkland Place for the past three years, helping individuals navigate various addictions through counselling. 

 The 39-year-old now works as a Welsh Women’s Gambling Co-ordinator for Adferiad, where she delivers guidance to individuals, all over Wales, facing issues with addiction.  

 Elissa champions Adferiad’s work in the media, giving her experience and expertise on gambling, where she has been a valuable voice and inspiring others that change is possible.  

“I don’t carry that shame anymore,” she says. “The past is the past, and I’m doing something about it today. I feel like I’m turning all the negative stuff into positive — to help others.”